Dir. Peter Strickland | Now Streaming On: Paramount+ | Rating: 1/5

If you’ve heard our British horror episode on No Bodies, you’ll know that I’m generally not a fan of horror comedy and I don’t love British comedy in particular. (Other than Shawn of the Dead, of course.) Getting myself through In Fabric felt like pulling teeth. Getting myself through this review may be just as uncomfortable.

In Fabric is supposed to be a dark comedy on consumerism, self image, and loneliness. If any of this was actually funny, I mean. This review is going to make me sound like a soulless grouch, but I was so unamused and bored watching this.

The first half of the film follows divorcee Sheila as she struggles to date again. She purchases a designer dress that causes harm to follow her everywhere. This is what the synopsis of the film alludes to, so when it suddenly changes storylines entirely in the second half of the film, I thought this was turning into an anthology. But alas, it’s not that either. Just a haphazardly strung together nonsensical interconnected story.

This film uses absurdity as both the horror and the comedy element, which means basically no part of this makes any sense. I know, I know. Horror is too serious, we need to lighten up. But this isn’t rubber chicken absurdity, this is some cosmic karma also maybe sex magic absurdity? Maybe? I wish I could tell you, because lord knows I had no idea what this was trying to tell me.

Disjointed, unfunny, and long winded – In Fabric is a flop, striking out hard as my first experience with A24’s horror comedy contributions. This might be one of the shortest reviews I’ve ever written. My parting thoughts will be in memorandum of the 2 hours of my life I spent watching this that I will never get back.

Know Before You Watch: Features flashing lights, blood, sex, nudity, death.